I spent Sunday morning watching pregnancy announcement videos on YouTube. I couldn't stop watching. I felt sorry for myself. Infertility has affected my life in different ways and I don't like it. I honestly don't mind all the doctor's appointments, all the blood work, injections, ultrasounds, etc. I do mind the "unknown"; not knowing whether I will ever be able to get pregnant. I want to be pregnant, I want to experience pregnancy. Does that make me selfish?
I have done two medicated cycles; a combination of Clomid, and HCG shot. This cycle, its a combination of Clomid, HCG Shot, and Progesterone. Needless to say, the first two cycles did not work. They both ended up with a BFN. Will this cycle work? I am really hoping so.
Will I ever get my BFP? Not knowing how to answer this question makes me sad... not knowing its the main reason why I cry all the time.
Infertility is just awful and it affects everyone differently. I often wake up in the middle of the night and pray that infertility is not as awful to my husband as it is for me.
So, I think it is fair to say that infertility affects one's self-esteem.