Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Fertility Doctor

I sat here for several minutes staring at the computer monitor because I have so many emotions going through my mind as I write this post.

I am sad. I am scared. I feel hopeless. You may think I am dramatic, and that's fine! but this is truly how I am feeling right now.

If you read my blog, you know that my husband and I are trying to conceive our first baby. I finally had the courage to make a doctor's appointment today and tomorrow my TTC roller coaster will take a different turn. I feel like I am labeled as infertile now because we are no longer trying on our own, we are seeking help. Don't get me wrong, I want help; however, with help comes the cruel reality and or confirmation that "something" may be wrong. or maybe no, right?

I have been unable to control my feelings today. And I keep reminding myself that "babies can't have babies" as my husband would say. I need to stop being a baby about this, and be strong. I just need to figure out how :sigh:

I spent hours getting prepare for tomorrow's appointment. I requested my complete medical record to take with me, printed my BBT chart, and have several questions that I need to ask. I do not know what to expect, but I sure hope I don't start crying in front of the doctor.

I am going to be as positive as I can be with this experience. I am willing to do anything and everything so one day I can hold my own baby!


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