Monday, October 31, 2011

Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween! 

I have a good feeling that by this time next year, 
my husband and I are going to be celebrating Halloween with...
A BABY! 
Keeping my fingers crossed :-)
Until then, I couldn't wait to share a collage of our dog, Chloe!

Chloe loves running, sleeping, eating, chilling, and just relaxing!
She was such a cute puppy. She is obedient and enjoys attention
She loves to help
and she loves to dress up!

I hope you are enjoying your night giving out candy to the kiddies!



Sunday, October 30, 2011

2 chix.

My friends called me Bridezilla a few years ago
When I am pregnant, they may call me

PREGZILLA
and then they can buy me this T-shirt!

I found this awesome maternity clothes website called 2 chix and I am in love... Their voluptuous tees are cute with sassy sayings! and they are 100% cotton.

and for my husband...
The 'he shoots, he scores" t-shirt is a must :-)

Seems like my husband is going to have a huge selection of new t-shirts.
He NEEDS to have the following t-shirts:









Looks like my husband may be getting all these t-shirts for x-mas! 

Hormones

I spent a couple hours this morning learning about Clomid. One of my husband's co-worker told him that I really shouldn't take any hormones because of birth defects. I never really thought about this until my husband mentioned it to me last night. 

Okay, so Provera is a hormone, progesterone. This medicine is used for various menstrual problems. This medicine is not recommended if pregnant or breastfeeding. I am not pregnant nor breastfeeding. In my case, there was no other solution to my menstruation problem. I needed my menstruation. I was on CD65 and no AF and plenty BFNs. When you are trying to conceive having to wait around is not really an option. I was not going to wait to have my AF naturally. 

I trust my doctor. He is one of the best in the area. I decided to go to him because he was highly recommended by two of my friends, he has great reviews online, and a high success rate. I spent a lot of time and tears searching for a good doctor. I felt relief when I found one; even though I have to drive about an hour away from home to see him. My husband seems comfortable with him as well, and that was very important for me. 

I look up to my husband for almost everything. I learn a lot from him, he pushes me to be a better person every day, so having his approval meant a lot to me. 

Clomid is used to induce ovulation and its also a hormone, estrogen. If I am not ovulating on my own, is there another option besides Clomid? Perhaps there is... 
But my doctor seems to think Clomid would help us get pregnant if I am not ovulating. The only problem I have with this medicine is the fact that it can increase ovarian cancer. However, this side effect is only if you are taking this medicine for a long period. 

25% of infertility patients have problems with ovulation, and Clomid seems to be a fertility drug that its easy to take with no many side effects. Not to mention 80% of patients who were prescribed Clomid ovulated after completing the treatment. Clomid can decrease the quality of your cervical mucus, and the lining of your uterus. Clomid also gives you 10% chance of having twins. 

But most importantly, in my case, if I am not ovulating on my own, Clomid will give my eggs the chance to be fertilized. This fertility drug could give me the chance to conceive... the chance to be a mom!

There is a chance that Clomid can cause birth defects but this is ONLY if you take it after you become pregnant. Clomid is prescribed at the beginning of your cycle for a few days. So becoming pregnant while taking this medicine is nearly impossible; especially if you follow every step the doctor recommended.

I see no harm on taking this medicine... 

I have until November 15 to learn more about this drug and see if I really need it. If so, my husband and I will make a decision then. 

Friday, October 28, 2011

Fall Followers Fest

This is such an amazing idea! Going right now, its the 'Fall Followers Fest'... This event is hosted by Casey, Danielle, Jess, and Much Love Illy!

Ladies, thank you so much for doing this.
Photobucket

If you are not participating, what are you waiting for?
I already 'discovered' so many great blogs

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Ovulation

I am not sure whether or not I should use OPKs this cycle. I am officially on CD2 today after taking Provera for 10 days. I am scheduled to go to the doctors on CD 21 to test for ovulation. 

I am struggling to decide if I should wait until my blood test to confirm or deny ovulation or if I should test at home as well so I am not surprise of the results. 

My husband thinks I should not test this cycle. Even if I get a positive OPK at home, the blood test can still come back negative, right? So, should I spend money and purchase a kit? or just wait for my blood test?

When I asked the doctor if I should continue trying, he replied "yes". I can do the SMEP again and start baby dancing from CD 8 every other day. 

My friends think my "problem" is that I am stressing too much about this whole trying to conceive journey. So, perhaps taking a break from BBT and OPKs would help me relax a little bit this cycle. At this point, I am not sure what I am going to end up doing. But I sure know that I am afraid about my upcoming doctor's appointment. 

Let's say I go to the doctors, take the blood test, and it comes back positive. Do I celebrate I am ovulating on my own? or do I start crying because that means something else is wrong? Which one is worse? I feel like I am stuck again. I feel hopeless. 

... and if its negative! What is the next step? Clomid? 

If I start Clomid, how many cycles until I am pregnant? One, two, three? I know Clomid treatments start as low as 25mg and they go up... 50mg, 100mg... which dosage is the correct dosage for me? 
...what happens if my body does not respond to Clomid? Okay, okay... I will not get ahead of the game!

Maybe I am feeling this way because I want a quick solution... I want to be pregnant now. I should probably have a different perspective about this, but somehow I can't (at least not now). 

I know that my husband and I will be parents one day! I guess I am just anxious to find out when the next chapter of our life begins...(or is this the beginning?)

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Provera

:sigh: my hpt was negative, and my blood test was also negative. I am on CD65 and AF is not here.

Doc prescribed me Provera 10mg for 10 days, took my last pill yesterday, now I have to wait for AF to show up; apperantly this occurs any time after 3 days from your last dosage up to 10 days.

I am worry that I may not get my AF... For the first time in my life, I want my AF, badly!!!

So for now, this TTC journey is a waiting game... I am waiting for my AF, so then I can wait until CD21 for my ovulation testing. Or maybe, I will be waiting for my BFP at the same time.


Monday, October 17, 2011

999 Reasons To Laugh at Infertility

When you are feeling sorry for your self... just visit this website and you will feel better... it doesn't change the fact that AF show up or you keep getting 100+ BFNsss but you can grasp a little hope and continue fighting against infertility...

Birds & Bees: The Real Story

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Loving you!


If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you. 
~The Notebook

I am still hopeful!

My husband took me to lunch yesterday, once we were all done eating, we called the doctor's office to see if my blood test results were in but they weren't. They assured us that as soon as they have the results from the lab we will get a call right away. I am still hopeful and waiting... just waiting!

I have it all planned out - plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I'll listen. When you come looking for me, you'll find me. 
~Jeremiah 29:11-14

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Hopeful

I made a doctor's appointment this past Tuesday, and luckily my husband was able to come with me. This cycle has been difficult for us. The last time AF visited me was August 19th and as of right now (10/06/2011) AF is not here and there are no signs that she is coming to visit anytime soon. I am on cycle day 49. I continue to get negative OPKs since my last positive one on 09/15/2011. So let's say I ovulated on 09/16/2011 that would make me 20 DPO.

At 20 DPO, I tested negative for pregnancy.

I had an ultrasound done this past Tuesday and there is a "menstruation cyst" on my right ovary. The doctor is not concern about it, but as soon as he told my husband I started crying, assuming that I have PCOS. The doctor assured us that it was not PCOS; however, he would like to do another ultrasound in the upcoming months. The doctor was calm and so was my husband, I was not!!! I was and still am freaking out.

The doctor did not rule out pregnancy yet.

So,  here I am waiting for the doctor's office to call me and let me know my blood test results. He decided to test for pregnancy and progesterone. I sure hope my progesterone levels are as high as the sky!

I am hopeful, anxious, excited, sad, happy, and concern. Regardless of the results, I am relief to know that the doctor already gave me a solution to make my AF visit if I am not pregnant. Which means, I am step closer to becoming a mom.

As a mention in previous posts, once AF comes, I will have to make a doctor's appointment at cycle day 21 to test if I am ovulating on my own or not. If I am not, the doctor will start treatment (whatever that means!).

I am not alone in this. My husband and I will be parents one day! There is not doubt that there are going to be good and bad days... If I feel like crying, I will cry. If I feel like laughing, I will laugh. *Thanks for the advice Kristen!~*

I am not giving up this fight and I know every day I am step closer to having the family my husband and I want.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Emotional Bag Check

Whether you are feeling crappy or loving life, you need to check out 'Emotional Bag Check'... 

This website allows you to share your "emotional baggage" and get a response from someone who is willing to bright your day....or you can give advice to someone else and or recommend a song! 
It is a beautiful idea! 






The Girlfriends Guide To Pregnancy


     I absolutely love this book. It is funny, yet it has so much information about pregnancy; information that doctors don't tell you. But most importantly, it dedicates a whole chapter to fathers-to-be. I am not pregnant yet (wishing I was, believe me!) but I truly hope that I don't neglect my husband's feeling throughout the pregnancy. Sure he is not going to be the one carrying the baby inside him; however, he is going to have a lot of chances coming his way too during pregnancy. I will not look the same, and thanks to hormones, I will not act the same either. If you are planning on getting pregnant, or are pregnant, you should really buy this book. You will not regret it!
      

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Someone Like You


Don't forget to mute my playlist!